Day 6: The Waterfall that didn't fall

Ok, so last night was big one and this morning has all but passed with so much as a stir from Mr and Mrs G... It was probably the jet lag... I've heard day 6 is often the worst!

So after showers and swims, the world (or more specifically, a very beautiful 50 square mile part of it) is our oyster.

Hungover 2pm Breakfast

 I think we need another scooter!

After a little bit of wobbling about, we were on the straight and narrow and heading off for a lap of the island to take in some island nature. There's basically one main road the follows the coast around the island, so we followed it to the southern most point and headed inland towards the imaginatively named "Waterfall 1"

We pulled up and headed of in to the jungle for the short but very hilly trek towards the waterfall. The first thing to notice is that the middle of the island is hotter.... quite a lot hotter... and the second thing to notice is that clammy feet in flip flops are not ideal for jungle adventures. Yep, Dave fell down the side of a hill much to Laura's amusement!

After about 20 minutes of very (ok, moderately) treacherous walking we arrived at the waterfall. More specifically, we arrived at where the waterfall, where we could hear the faintest trickle of water but could see none. Apparently this is where the Waterfall would have been if we weren't  visiting at the the end of the dry season. Strangely, they kept it to themselves at the wobbly little shack where the insist you pay for parking your scooter in the middle of a ginormous field.

Poor Davey!

Still, it was fun in the jungle (apart from the peril obviously) but we didn't stay too long.

We went a little further in to the middle of the island and a little higher up into the mountains and found a nice little viewing platform with views across the edge of the mountain and right down to the coast. For some inexplicable reason, someone had build a concrete base for a sewing machine on the platform, but I guess sometimes you've just gotta sew!

Back to base and in the evening we decided to explore slightly in the opposite direction from Fishermans village, which basically meant having cocktails two hotels down, instead of ours.

Suitably cocktailed, we hiked back to Fishermans village (200m this time!) and into "The Shack" following a recommendation from lots of people. We proceeded to eat the best steak... ever.

We opted for the Australian tenderloin at a paltry £30, but there was Kobu and Wagyu (?) beff on offer which was up to about £80 per piece... Couldn't convince ourselves to do it, but didn't regret the decision.

Fed and watered, it was off to bed. 

Big day tomorrow.

Day 5: Getting to grips with Island life... Sigh

Not such a late start this morning... Must be getting acclimatised.

We put in some hard core pool time in the morning. The pool complex at the Hansar is stunning. There's a great big infinity pool which allows you too float up to the edge and look across to the beach and sea. Very relaxing indeed.

 This morning also heralded one of the trips major discoveries... The pool side restaurant does literally the best ham and cheese toasties in the world! Dave promised (and delivered) that he would try Thai food. In fact, he rather enjoyed it. But those toasties!

Once all that grub had gone down, we walked to the village (about 100m if anyone was thinking we might be getting adventurous or energetic) and hired a scooter... It was a pretty girly thing and we later noticed that Dave's crash hat had a big sticker proclaiming him a "pretty lady".. Nice.

We took a short ride to the Big Buddha temple for a look around and a rummage through the endless sea's of seemingly identical shops. Laura was still looking for a replacement elephant statue!

After a pretty relaxing day we got ourselves ready and headed out briefly into the walking market along fisherman's village before grabbing a taxi and heading to Chaweng for a bit of a lively night out.

The initial plan was to go watch an hour or so of the Thai boxing before heading off for a swanky meal before getting smashed in a neon bar somewhere.... The plan didn't really work out.

First thing we learned is that the boxing arena is not very close to anything else in Chaweng... or at least, not the way we were heading. The second thing we learning is that Davey is always hungry. So, we decided to eat before the boxing. After all, it's on 'til midnight? Right?

We strolled off into what we thought was town. It wasn't...

We walked for about 40 minutes, by which time Dave has got the right hump and declares that everything fun happens at the beach, we need to find the beach!

God Damn Mother Flipper.... the beach is quiet (apart from Dave's muffled complaining and rumbling stomach).... at least there's a breeze. So off we wander.

Another 15 minutes or so and we find a beach restaurant. I'd like to think it was called Oasis, but it probably wasn't. Either way, they had cold beer and food and a single Bob Marley album.

Whilst enjoying the above, we surveyed the situation and squinted optimistically at "some sort of flashing lights" at the other end of the beach... "Oh stuff it, lets go see what's going on and if its rubbish, we'll get a cab and go home".

We found the ARK bar. Fire dancers, house music, cheap beers and cocktails and MONKEYS!

Yes good people of the Interweb. Monkeys!

We were sat at our little table tucking into a bucket of Mai Tai (don't judge us, it's culture innit) and this man walks along and plops something on Laura's shoulder. Dave's protective instincts momentarily kick in until he realises its a flipping gibbon.... and with that, ARK bar became the best bar in the world. Ever.
 

Day 4: Touch Down in Koh Samui

Breakfast in the hotel and then back to Bangkok Airport. Laura, who loves a new food, ate a Chinese Bun. It was like a puff of fluff with custard inside.

We chilled in the Bangkok Airways lounge and spotted a celeb- Thai Micheal McIntyre- ok so not actually a celeb but a very good 'look-a-like' spot by Dave.

The flight was quick, just an hour and we landed in Koh Samui's ecological airport.  The airport is a tropical garden and there are no walls! Baggage collection under thatched roof pergolas and its full of tropical birds.

Laura was overjoyed... there may have even been tears.

We jumped in a taxi transfer to our first hotel- The Hansar in Boput.

Luckily, we were the first stop of the transfer and as we got out of the taxi, we realised we were going to be in for a treat. The Hansar is simply beautiful.

Nowhere has walls, and why would you? There's a feature fountain inside and glimpses of the pools and the sea and still only two steps inside.

One of the (many) very nice ladies brings us some sort of honey tea and Laura begins to sob. It seems she's pleased with our choice.


After the quickest and most excited unpack of the trip, we are out and pool side for the first of many rounds of "2 Singha's and 2 Tom Yum Martini's please mate"

In the evening we took our first venture into Fisherman's Village, which is more of a street than a village to be fair, but it is a lovely street.

We stopped for drinks (yes, more drinks) and some Thai din dins at the Happy Elephant restaurant. Ignore the tacky name and imagine a choice of a breezy balcony overlooking the beach or a table where you dip your toes in the sand. Naturally Dave opted for the breeze.

Happy Sigh

Day 3: Puke at the Grand Palace

Don't know what time we got in last night...

A forced down breakfast, a fraught cab ride around various road blockades, hideous traffic jams and ropey driving topped of with a hideous hangover all culminated in Laura puking in the Grand Palace... (luckily Thai's aren't religious or in to their Royal family.... oh no, wait!)

After the puke, a few soft drinks and soothing coconut ice cream we were ready for the culture.

It was a cultural marathon!

Dave was peeved as shoulders and legs needed to be covered for all the religious sites. Shirt and trousers in 35 degrees... not a happy boy! Still despite the sick and all the clothes we had fun!

 The temples we amazing we did The Grand Palace, The Golden Mount and the most breath taking was Wat Pho (aka. The Temple of the Reclining Buddha)

Whilst photographing "Nispro" the brass elephant (again), it seems Laura had misplaced him and he was gone forever. She was desolate... Dave tried to comfort Laura that the lovely Monks would look after him, but he knew the grim truth that he was probably scooped up into the sex industry! Ha Ha.

Post culture we stopped off at Siam Center and perused the shops where Dave showed ultimate patience.

A quick change and we headed out to Vertigo, an open air restaurant on the 62nd floor of The Banyan Tree hotel. The most amazing views, most potent Lychee Martinis and the best steak we have ever eaten.

On to Koh Samui tomorrow!

Day 2: Bangkok Scams and Sunsets

We overslept...

We woke up at midday and even that was a struggle.

We headed down for a dip in the pool, which we had to ourselves except for an small army of people cleaning & maintaining everything in sight. Which explains why everything here is immaculate!

Post swim we headed out to do the cultural bit. We got off the train and ran straight into a very well placed man, uber friendly, who told us 'the temples were too far to walk and they were closed anyway... what we wanted to do was a boat tour of old Bangkok.'

Without a seconds hesitation we were bundled into a Tuk tuk and on our way down a strange little back alley with the distinct feeling we were being taken for a ride.

We arrived at the River Cruise place and were shown to our own long boat for a private tour... it was £40... which is probably way too much but it ended up being really fun. 

We saw old Bangkok built on stilts out of the river, we saw people swimming, fishing, praying at the temples and just doing their day to day in their homes all from the comfort of a boat with a couple of Singha beers.

We were dropped off at market and once again redirected with by another friendly guy 'in the know' (the thing is that everyone is so nice that you don't even mind being 'redirected') in this case we were redirected to the temple of the standing Buddha, a tailors and then finally the Khao San Road- where we actually wanted to be.

24 hours in

Temple of the standing Buddha

The Khao San road was a lot nicer than we'd imagined (which as we found out is because we weren't on the Khao San Road... to be explained). By this time we had been in Thailand for over 48hrs and so naturally Dave was desperate for a pizza!

After pizza we perused market stalls and bars and soaked it all in. At the end of what we thought was the Khao San road we came across a sign which said 'Short Cut to the Khao San Road' a bit confused we decided to take the short cut...

It lead down the darkest scariest alley we encountered in Thailand, we were convinced mugging and death were on the cards, still we ventured on.

Death Alley Shortcut... it was pitch black

At the end of death all there was another sign 'This is not the end! Go up the stairs and down the other side.' It felt like we had come too far to go back so up the stairs we went. We came out in a travel agents... down the stairs and we were in a bar... we stepped out of the Bar... Now this was the Khao San Road!

Drinks, lady boys and cheap T-shirts...

After too much of all of the above (well, alright.... not all of the above..... None of the t-shirts were very nice) we settled down for a few beers in a noisy bar kicking out the stones. After approximately 9 seconds, the chap next to us introduced himself by singing the stones at the top of his voices and they ended up joining us for late night grub and waaaay too many drinks!

Bangkok has us now!